Weaning Wisdom - Parenting Pearls you need to know NOW!

Whether they’re tentatively taking their first few teaspoons or shovelling spaghetti bolognese with wild abandon, weaning can be one of the most rewarding but most challenging phases for new parents.
We tend to agonise over every twist and turn, dissect every choice and decision, but if we can remind ourselves to take a little step back and remove the pressure from the process just a teeny, weeny bit, we soon realise what an absolute joy shared mealtimes can be.

Reframe your dining endeavours with these surprisingly simple but wonderfully wise words. Before you know it, you’ll revel in magically messy but marvellously manageable mealtimes. Of course, we’ve added a small helping of humour because, let’s face it, that’s another big tip for surviving parenthood with your sanity intact.

Mess is Best Every Time

Let’s start with this because aside from the fear of choking, it’s probably one of the largest sources of anxiety. Parents with beige kitchens, there’s no easy way to put it. Mess really is critical for their development, so the sooner you get your head around it, the better. We’re oversimplifying it, and we hear you. The thought of extreme mess can be overwhelming, and it can be tempting to continually wipe their face for the duration of every meal, but you could be creating an extra large portion of picky-eating trouble for yourself later down the line.
With a little prep and the right kit, you can minimise your stress and set your little one up for feeding success in the future.
Check out our blog on The No-Clean Mealtime Method. It’s proven and also incredibly liberating for you and them. You can bookmark it for later, but the general gist is that developing babies must handle and explore their food, not just imbibe it. When they’re gleefully squishing and squashing it between their fingers and in their hands, they’re unwittingly fine-tuning motor skills. When they’re mashing and mushing it on their lips and faces, they’re experiencing texture, taste, and smell and getting acquainted with, well, mess.

Knowledge is power
Time to go back to that first fear. Choking is the single biggest reason that weaning parents stick to purees and struggle to advance their baby along the texture timeline (you can read more about that here).
The best way to allay most fears is to be prepared with knowledge. It’s really important to understand the difference between gagging and choking. Gagging is a normal human response your child needs to do safely to expel food. They’ll do it a lot in the early days of weaning, and that’s good. It will teach them how to safely chew and move food around their mouth. Understanding gagging will prevent you from overreacting and causing undue stress at mealtimes. The cost of a good course is around £25 - a worthwhile investment and less than the cost of a takeaway. It’s a no-brainer when you look at it like that. Check out our Gagging versus Choking blog with the legendary Kate Ball from Mini First Aid. It’ll boost you weaning confidence and arm you with vital strategies for what to do if you’re ever faced with an emergency.

Let it go, Let it go….in the freezer
Frozen isn’t just a soundtrack that’ll replace your penchant for Taylor Swift in the years ahead. It’s a nod to your new best friend in the kitchen. It’s time to get acquainted with your freezer.
In the early days, babies will eat small amounts of food. You’ll soon lose momentum for cooking Gordon Ramsey-style menus from fresh when you’ve toiled over the stove for 3 hours to discover they’re only up for a teaspoon of your lovingly prepared broccoli and cauliflower bake. Boss it at batch cooking and keep plenty of options in the freezer. The small portions will defrost quickly and reduce your need to turn to pouches - a convenient and perfectly good option sometimes, but they can be expensive and rarely beat home-cooked.

Boss Baby
Let go of your anxieties about how much they’re eating, and let them lead the way. Babies are surprisingly good at self-regulation, and it’s a skill they need to acquire. Don’t be tempted to force-feed them everything on the plate. Look out for the cues. They've probably had enough if they’re constantly pushing away the bowl or plate, turning their head away or pushing your hands away. If you insist on pushing them past their boundaries, you can compromise trust, and they’ll also lose the ability to understand and know their own body. Naturally, you can discuss any concerns with your health visitor or health professional, but trust that babies know when they’re hungry or full.

Everything is a stage
Let go of frustrations and unrealistic expectations early on. Like many phases in parenting, weaning will be wonderful and woeful in equal measure (we’re here for the more wonderful). Keep an open mind, and don’t feel pressured to simulate the social media images of pristine plates and perfect weaning. Your best is what counts. Not every day will be an ‘I love avocado and asparagus’ day. Your little one won’t always be in the best mood or open to exploration. Your consistency and resilience are what matter. Show up daily and be prepared for what they throw at you - literally and metaphorically.

Britain’s Next Top Model
Don’t worry, you’re still in the right place. We’re talking about the slurping and chomping kind of modelling rather than the sashaying and strutting type. What you do and demonstrate at the table is almost as important as what you put before them on their super-strength suction plate.
Take every opportunity to be beside or in front of them at mealtimes. Technically, you should always be there for safety during weaning, so don’t leave them alone. Aside from safety, the social aspect of dining is incredibly important - more of that below, but modelling is another proven way to teach your baby how to eat. Have you noticed how they’ll watch you intently as you chew and chomp or show interest in what's on your plate and going onto your fork and into your mouth? Put simply, eating together sparks curiosity and fuels their learning. They’ll learn so much through observation, so prep yourself to be their first teacher. Show them the way by exaggerating mouth movements and adding encouragement with positive expressions and statements about the food on your plates. Drink from an open cup using both hands and demonstrate how to shovel, stab and scrape food with spoons and forks.

Good habits start young
FYI, French kids throw food, but that’s not to say that we can’t learn valuable lessons from other cultures. The French do well by instilling a sense of routine and predictability around mealtimes and celebrating coming together as a family. Conversely, other cultures fall into the trap of rushing mealtimes as a tick-list chore, multi-tasking, and feeding babies in isolation.
Dining together is essential for building bonds and healthy attitudes towards mealtimes. Start as you mean to go on and help them develop and understand social norms and cues. Even if it’s not a practicality every day, try to assign at least a handful of mealtimes a week where you eat together and savour rather than fast-track the experience. Haste at meal times is rarely a good idea; you might sacrifice what you save in time now in negotiating with kids who won’t sit nicely at a table.

You do YOU
Ask for help and advice, but don’t tolerate unnecessary judgement. Your baby, your family, your rules. Determine what works for your family and politely decline intrusive or unsolicited advice if it doesn't sit well with you. Times change, and what went in your parents' or grandparents’ day may not be the rules of engagement today. Learn to exert your confidence and authority, own your weaning, and not let others railroad you. You have to be comfortable with your own choices. It’s an experience you’ll want to enjoy, and it takes time, patience and a little experimentation here and there to find your groove.

Happy, wonderful weaning from our family to yours